But if the other party has already left the marriage-- mind , body and soul , then it's just chasing something that isn't there . Her actions and words have all been 100% , and according to the counselors that shows her resolve to move on, she's exhibited nothing but a will to leave this marriage , there will never be an opening. Anger only lasts so long , she's at the stage of moving on, I tend to agree with the counselors --been more than a month and my wife can care less about me .
Last edited by Aj8; 07/15/1506:10 AM.
Me:35 W:30 7 years together 11 months married No children W Left me-moved to her moms: June 2015 W filed for D: July 2015
You're choice, you will be the one to live with the consequences. You've been at this for what, a month? Unless she's a sociopath she still cares. Just because she doesn't show it doesn't mean anything. You've invested 7 yrs in this relationship and you're listening to others telling you to move on? I'm sure she did the same thing but you probably had an issue with. I guess do what makes you "feel" right. Really determine if this is what you truly want. If it is I wish you luck and a better future.
M40 XW35 M11 T15 S9 D5 Bomb 6/3/14 Papers del 10/3/14 D final 12/5/14
I wish I could love you and make you believe it 'Cause that's all you ever wanted From me
Hey AJ8 I just signed up on here. Going thru same thing as you. My wife filed for divorce 3 weeks ago. I have to have a response to the court within 30 days, so my time is running out. Seeing attorney on Friday. How do I progress thru this, I mean the divorce part? What have you done?....Do you just go along or you try and stall things out. What have you been told to do?
But if the other party has already left the marriage-- mind , body and soul , then it's just chasing something that isn't there . Her actions and words have all been 100% , and according to the counselors that shows her resolve to move on, she's exhibited nothing but a will to leave this marriage , there will never be an opening. Anger only lasts so long , she's at the stage of moving on, I tend to agree with the counselors --been more than a month and my wife can care less about me .
I'm really not trying to be a DB-mind controlled-zombie. But I want to ask you again. Specifically, what will be DIFFERENT when you "give up hope"?
Will you stop checking her FB? Stop waiting for her texts? Stop over analyzing every thing you or she does or did? Go out and make new friends? Take up new hobbies? Take better care of yourself? Think about your faults and change them? Better understand your needs for your next R?
All of these are things that have been advocated to you already. That's why I said that the way I see it, the only difference is starting to date again. Otherwise, I believe you will be so much more successful in ^^^ if you still have hope of R. But that's just my opinion.
Hi Bobby , it varies by state but I think if the 30 days pass they will serve you ? Me I have 30 days too and will sign it, if I don't she'll hate me even more . In my state of California it takes about 6 months to finalize so I'll have that time .
Matt I've detached fully , don't even check her fb(can't anyway she took me off ) I'm working on me w/o hope of her coming back, Bc she's shown nothing that as a counselor said would even hint that she's keeping a door open , all "her doors" according to them are shut and locked .
Me:35 W:30 7 years together 11 months married No children W Left me-moved to her moms: June 2015 W filed for D: July 2015
Matt I've detached fully , don't even check her fb(can't anyway she took me off ) I'm working on me w/o hope of her coming back, Bc she's shown nothing that as a counselor said would even hint that she's keeping a door open , all "her doors" according to them are shut and locked .
Without even getting into the bolded ^^^, I'm still trying to understand my question above. My W has shown exactly the same things as yours. While we have kids together, so we have to have some level of contact, it's been otherwise exactly the same. I'm trying to understand what your MC team thinks will be different by giving up hope of R. As I said, the only thing that I can imagine being different if I were to TRULY give up hope of R would be for me to start dating again. I don't see how doing all of the other things I listed is impacted negatively at all by keeping hope for R alive.
