So see? This isn't about "doing what H told you to do" or about "avoiding him." This isn't about your H or how he will react one way or the other. GAL is about finding YOU again. It's about regaining clarity. Finding your center during an otherwise unbearable situation. Learning that you are okay and that you will BE okay. Learning to breathe in life again and actually enjoy it when you would otherwise be sulking at home or spinning your wheels over your H's wacky behavior right now.
Yes, yes, OMG, yes!
In the simplest of terms, figure out what it will take to make you happy, THEN DO IT. Do NOT be held hostage by your errant spouse, not even for a minute. And as it happens, nothing will turn him around faster than realizing that you don't NEED him to be happy. But if you give him that power, he WILL abuse it.
And Starsky is dead on -- either way you win. You figure you out. Ultimately, H will be in or out, but it won't really matter, since you will know what you need.
