Heading toward affair- what to do?

[Train]

So should I jump back into that?

As hard as I know this is to understand in your current circumstances, none of what you do should be done to get a response/reaction from your H.

No, I don't think you should go out to *avoid* your H. I think you should go out, genuinely intent on having a good time and re-discovering yourSELF. This will build your confidence, and that always leads to good things. (Either your H will be re-attracted to you, or you will discover that you will be fine without him. Either way: You win!)

It always helped me to think about it like this: Your H has fired you as his W for right now. So why should he care what you're doing? And why should YOU care what he guesses you're doing?

As for him accusing you of having an A, I'm not surprised. I think the explanations for that line of crazy-thinking are pretty obvious.