I am guessing with guilt and the fact the honeymoon phase can not and will not last, certain things with OW are bubbling to the surface. So in her gut she is wondering .. 'ok .. what is it with OW that felt oh so wonderful and now has started to fade?' (hence the 'break' she needed not long ago ... plus the seeds you planted) and she is looking to you for that 'ah ha' moment .... but DO NOT give her that .. that needs to happen with her, only she can arrive to the final "OW is not who I thought, nor who I truly want" .... hopefully then, you have created the best option after doing all this work you have done at DB-University.
It is now, its time for you to distance yourself a bit and take things for what they are. W needs time to figure it all out, and you need time to continue to work on yourself and you can not do that being all up in her head, or her in yours. Read enough here and the WAS has to FEEL they are going to lose the LBS at some point .... if you are always there and available ... standing outside the porch always waiting for her .... where is the reason for her to stop and think .... she is being allowed to continue as she desires with no consequences .. this is the important lesson, consequences are what keeps us from running out into the street, why we get a DD after drinking, they are rules we live by .. some of which we do because of our moral compass, but when that breaks ... then what? CONSEQUENCES help balance that out. To much cake makes one fat n happy. I am not saying slam the door in her face, you can have that door cracked open with a light on ... but inside the house you should be going about your life doing your thing and being happy ... not sitting on the couch awaiting her arrival like a puppy.
