Again Friday night I worked, home at a nice 2:45 a.m. crashed and W picked me up around 7:30 for the 2nd Post session. I honestly got little out of this session, both presentations were by much older couples ... talking they have been married collectively 110+ years .... so not really much I could relate to.
The one topic of interest, and something I found interesting was Family of Origin. Basically touched on how we were raised, what we experienced and about our childhoods. We were told to answer about 7-8 questions on this ... after we were told to exchange, I noticed W was upset a bit ... there was a couple questions that to be honest stung for me to have to answer. We exchange and W only answered 3 questions ... I looked at her puzzled and with tears in her eyes she told me she can not remember.
She has been struggling lately, sharing she is trying to deal with herself .. figure out things .. this memory block of hers and her childhood seems to me has always been there, I am not sure what happened to her ... but over the years I have had 2 doctors approach me on the side asking if she experienced some sort of trauma when she was younger. Thinking of this now .. that MLC time-bomb was warning me for some time, I just had no idea.
Thing that is strange is over the weekend she was asking me about us, things she does not recall. She remembers certain things but I was sharing with S some shared memory of when her and I dated and she gave me this blank look like she was not even there ... something that I am starting to really wonder about ... maybe its the fog still ... not sure.
Sunday, went to church ... Football game was cancelled so I took S swimming, then grabbed some groceries. W had a bit of a blow up .... was like the old M, she gets spinning when she sees a mess, seems S's room set her off, funny thing is his room has been a disaster all week but all the sudden it set W off, so the entire place needed a deep cleaning ... I shrugged my shoulders and told her I understood, we started the clean-crew .. S and I were doing our thing ... then she blew a gasket over something small. Rather than allow her to spew and ruin a night, I tossed a series of truth darts... sharp pointy ones ... but S and I continued to organize his room as we were having fun together. W left and I heard her sobbing in the other room ... Cali 1.0 would have been there with the "now now its alright" ... but I let her be ... later she asked to talk and apologized, told me how wrong she was about the entire thing, discussed where it came from and we talked about how to avoid such events as that was really reminiscent of the Old M ... however I DB'd it and did a 180 that turned things, tucked that nugget in my pocket and realized how much I really have learned.
I completed MWD SSM book and am currently reading 2 others (Depending on where the iPad is .. one is on Kindle the other hard copy) W is reading the hard copy one with me, her IC suggested it. Its similar in overall theory with the detachment approach but is more in tune with an 'opposites attract' view point. It is interesting, and thankfully does not really conflict with the DB way of things ... in fact I think it might be a different perspective on a similar belief.
I am kind of laughing at myself ... this guy 3 years ago would not read a self help book if he were put to gun point to do so ... now I am almost ashamed at the current library I have going, Retrouvaille has a small little bookcase full of some, I was looking at it and W asked if I wanted to check a book out I laughed and told her I had 2 I was reading currently ... but in my head I was looking at the books and saying to myself "got it, got it, heard about it, on my list, got it .. oh that one is new"
So, at work looking to put some work into a side project I have been working on other than that ... its a nice day outside.
