[job]

Bright,
You are frustrated with your situation and it being stagnant, i.e., no real communication and/or movement towards reconciling w/your h. You are frustrated that people in the real world don't understand how you feel and why you aren't doing anything to cut the ties and you are frustrated w/the posters here because we continue to suggest things that you do not want to hear and/or do. I get it! That's why it's very important that you only take away from the postings what you can apply to your situation.

Again, no one is saying to give up and walk away. If something isn't working, then you try something different and that could mean trying to establish a dialogue w/your h to see where his head is at. You won't know until you try something different. It doesn't have to be a huge move because it could be a very simple text inquiring how he's doing or sharing something that has happened in your life recently.

Why not try a simple email or text message and inquire about how he's doing? It may just open the door for a bit of interaction. Bright, I'm going to put something out here for you to think about and I could be totally off base, but maybe your h thinks you don't care about him or what he's doing. Maybe things that he's been putting on FB could be to see if he would get a reaction out of you. Maybe he doesn't know how to open the door and step over the threshold to reach out to you because he knows he's done some stupid stuff and hurt you. Sometimes we have to take the first step to help them find a way back to us.

MLCers get comfortable w/the way things are going, especially if they are left alone to do their own thing. You've been a quiet individual and have not put any "demands" on him or his time. You've allowed him to go along his merry way and because of this, he's comfortable and happy w/how things are. He doesn't have a clue, or should I say, he doesn't care how you feel because he's on his own trip and enjoying life. MLCers do not think of anyone but themselves and what makes them feel good. You aren't happy and you are getting more and more frustrated w/how he's behaving and the little things that truly didn't bother you at first are now starting to bug you.

No one, as far as I can tell, is frustrated/bored w/your situation. Every situation is different and so are the people involved. There is no right or wrong way to handle a crisis situation, but there will come a time when you will need to decide to try something different to see if you get any type of reaction from the MLCer.

I care about you and see you struggling and I hope you take what I am about to suggest in the proper way as it is meant to be conveyed. Have you considered going to a support group for separated spouses or making an appointment to see an IC to discuss what has been happening in your world? The reason that I'm suggesting this is because you don't have anyone in the real world that you are discussing things w/and an IC or a support group can be a safe place to discuss what is going on w/you and your life. I'm not saying you are loony or depressed...just saying sometimes it helps to get things off your chest in a "safe" environment and you are not judged by what you do or don't do.

Bright, please think about what I've posted. Maybe it's time to open the door just a crack to see what's going on. It's time to think about doing something different. I know you are hesitant to try it, but what could it hurt to ask how he's doing?

Just my two cents.