Well, today is my first day on the new job and I can't say I'm really excited about it. I'm feeling ambivalent about this particular line of work, but like I said, it's going to keep me busy and occupied, so I'm grateful for that. It's storming here, and gloomy. Kind of like my life. I can't help but feel this morning, in spite of all my prayers and the signs here and there of cracks in their fantasy world, that I'm tilting at windmills, and that I really have lost her for good. It's a just a feeling, but it's hard for me to find hope today for coming out the other side of all this reconciled.
After work, I'm meeting someone for a drink. She's much younger than I am and interested in "older women," so I'm hoping she doesn't see it as more than that. But she did go out of her way to invite me to do this with her alone. My W also plans to be home tonight, so when I get back, I suspect there will be another round of "what do you know that I don't know" questions.
What I know is what she knows but chooses not to acknowledge: that the OW is a sociopath and a predator.
Wishing everyone here a good day.
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
