It appears STBX is seeing me as a friend. He messaged me today to tell me he had been successful in the first round of his legal case involving his Dad's Will. This of course had nothing to do with SD. He just wanted to share his news. I congratulated him and he texted back and forth for a bit telling me the details.
The weather here has been amazing. I have been busy with friends and family. My D bday was July 1. Plus working out as per usual lol.
Me 52 H 44 T9 M 5 BD 12/11 H split 8/12 OW moved in 12/12 OW gone for good 6/14 We get closer again 9/14 SD 13 Me 4 Grown
Accept what is...let go of what was and have faith in what will be.
Survived our wedding Anniversary. I know he wouldn't have even remembered. I spent it at work. Lol
Bought myself new shoes to cheer myself up. Took my dog for a run before work. We've had a heatwave here with many forest fires starting all over our Province.
The air was hazy and it smells like campfires everywhere. Praying for all the firemen out there fighting the fires.
Me 52 H 44 T9 M 5 BD 12/11 H split 8/12 OW moved in 12/12 OW gone for good 6/14 We get closer again 9/14 SD 13 Me 4 Grown
Accept what is...let go of what was and have faith in what will be.
Hey Karma...just wanted to drop a line in and let you know I'm starting to follow your sitch..really admire how long you've been doing this and how you're keeping a positive attitude, ill write more later but just saying hi!
ME: 28 W: 24 M: 2.5yrs T: 5yrs BD: 22 SEP 14 W Leaves: 5 OCT 14
Karma, so Im still reading through all your threads...but I gotta ask..how...why...were you able to keep such a PMA and persevere through 2.5 years of H living with someone else? That is such a long time...of him living with someone. Im surprised you didnt throw in the towel.
ME: 28 W: 24 M: 2.5yrs T: 5yrs BD: 22 SEP 14 W Leaves: 5 OCT 14
Hi all....sorry for the long absence. I was away in Mexico for a week with my D and SD. Then my Son and his GF arrived from the UK. They are still here for another week and living our hot Summer!
Vanilla, thanks for sticking by me. I will read your thread and catch up. Mom22....I am so happy to see you are still around. Hope you and your beautiful children are doing well. TLEE86....thanks for posting!
Ok so I will catch you all up and answer the questions you have asked.
Mom22 and TLEE85. Having a PMA has gotten me through many a challenging time in my life. Does that mean I think what my STBX did is respectable and ok? H-ll no!
I do believe my STBX went through ( and still is going through) a MLC. He I now know was depressed and had dealt with a number of loses in his life. He was blaming me for his unhappiness and plugged into the first thing he thought would make him happy. Just because I can understand as a human being how messed up he was does not mean I think it was ok for him to treat me and his own D horribly in his quest to find himself. One day he is going to have to deal with the fall out of all the band choices he made.
The other woman it seems got tired of his non commitment and moved on. She is now apparently married! Lol I have to say at the time he was living with her I had much less contact with him and was in survivor mode. It was after they broke up and I say some of my old STBX that I missed that things got more complicated.
I have kept busy and maintained "GaL" No matter what life will move forward. We have to live for ourselves. Yes I still have feelings for my STBX. The more he is like his old self the harder it seems. If you read about MLC on the MLC forum it will make more sense. I told my STBX recently that he seemed more himself again. He laughed and said he was still unwinding. To me that means he is not all the way out the MLC tunnel yet. He is slowly reconnecting with his family. ( the wife is always last). His behavior is all,over the place. That means even more so I have to GAL and keep busy.
I have dated a little here and there. No one special yet. I am happy as long as I have things to do and people to see. Will we ever get back together again? It would depend how much he learned from this. I don't know if I would ever trust him again with my heart. I do though as a human feel for him. I know he's been pretty messed up.
I am not happy about how he has treated my SD. She only has one childhood. She will be 14 this year. She is very angry with him and he is going to get a well deserved earful one day. He will never get these years with her back. I believe he will have a lot of regrets one day.
At present we are still apart but on friendly terms. Neither of us has filed for divorce. if he hasn't heard from me in a few days he still comes up with silly excuses to message me. He is still searching and learning. I am staying back to protect myself. Who knows what the future holds.....I'm just moving forward...one day at a time.
Cheers,
Karma
Me 52 H 44 T9 M 5 BD 12/11 H split 8/12 OW moved in 12/12 OW gone for good 6/14 We get closer again 9/14 SD 13 Me 4 Grown
Accept what is...let go of what was and have faith in what will be.
