Yes, my sitch is awfully similar. Although my H doesn't come to me seeking attention or gold stars.
Lately he has been talking a bit about his about his father. His father went through MLC-lived with 2nd wife through it and was a horrendous cake eater. I was young and certainly saw the dysfunction but because my H recognized it and abhorred it, I never in my wildest dreams thought it would strike him, too.
Twice in the last few months all on his own my S11 has said to my H. that he seems depressed. H of course denied it. He is very foggy still.
I will read up more on your sitch and post you there.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
