KGirl - letting the past go

[Mozza]

Thank you for posting, KGirl. When I saw your name, I had a reaction of joy and anticipation to see what you were up to.

It seems to me like you're learning a lot about yourself at the moment. This insight about not having your own hobbies is very important. An important aspect of what we bring in a relationship is precisely our own interests, that enrich the life of our partners. It is attractive to be interested and passionate about something.

A few months ago, after a lot of GAL, I had an epiphany: I could do what I really wanted. So far, I had simply made sure I would remain busy, but at that point, I realized that I could dig into my dreams, desires, pleasures, etc. Instead of saying "It would be nice to see this friend", I would think "Wait a sec does that mean I can finally do X?" Do X could be to binge watch a series for the first time, to cook myself something really really good, to invite a friend to see a show, etc. It doesn't have to be very expensive or complicated, but it has to be something that fills you with enthusiasm. I like to think of it as guilty pleasures: when you hear that cheesy song and truly enjoy it, despite the social pressure to reject it, then you know it's real enjoyment.

So, what is it that would make you feel really enthusiastic to do? Most likely, it will be something that's been staring you in the face all along but that you didn't really see so far.