Try toremember that he isn't trying to punish you. He's hurting. The natural response is to try to ease that pain. In his mind, hurting you, lashing out, throwing a temper tantrum all make him feel better. Just try to remember it isn't about YOU. It's about HIM. He's going to say and do things he knows will hurt you, but it's truly not about you. Time to buy stock in spew jackets.
With that in mind, try not to punish him back. You get to choose how you act and react to him. Act with the grace that you wish he had. There's nothing you can say to change him right now, but how does fighting back help you to heal or help him see the error in his ways. Be the person you want and deserve to be. It's not easy, but I believe you can do it!
You are so right, and I know this. I know hurt ppl hurt ppl. But I am getting so tired of it because I have a hard time not letting it affect me. I think I have mostly done good to not react badly... I haven't said anything hurtful & have only this week started to back away from him... Avoiding him when I can (when the kids aren't right there with us). But I am having a hard time detaching w/o being cold.
T: 14 M: 12 D: 9 S: 6 BD: 2/18/15 (H affair) Working on marriage: 3/12/15-6/11/15 Broken Trust (my error): 6/11/15 H ring off: 7/6/15; Comm w/ OW confirmed 7/13/15 H wants to work on fixing things: 7/21/15
