KGirl - letting the past go

[KGirl]

Mozza, I am still feeling uncertain about this whole online/texting/etc. dating thing even for being "young".. the last time I dated texting didn't really exist yet... I feel like I have no idea what the expectations are and I get super antsy if I don't hear from someone within 24 hours (because let's face it, we're all glued to our phones, so they definitely got the message...)

Just checking in. Not sure if any of the same people are even here anymore, and not feeling as motivated to flip through 10 pages of posts to try and find out Been on more dates, it's been about 50/50 in terms of who doesn't initiate further contact, so at least I'm not feeling rejected 100% of the time! Still trying to figure out what I like. I realized pretty quickly some things that sounded good on paper were pretty boring in real life.

Had to see XH a few weeks ago to sign a check from his mortgage refinancing stuff.. he tried to tell me all about some family drama and I had to cut him off and say I had to go. I'm not his sounding board anymore, his decision. I hear he spends most of his time with his best guy friend and relives his glory days in high school by going back there and "coaching" wrestling (volunteering).

I'm realizing as I'm dating that I put a lot of my own interests or possible hobbies aside in pursuit of marriage/having a home/making a partner happy and keeping a household together, because when dates ask me what I like to do in my free time I still don't really have answers. Something I need to work on and figure out what I'm truly passionate about. I'm passionate about my work and some of the theories and ideas behind it (like the value of a liberal arts education, especially since that's under attack nowadays) but I don't necessarily want to do something with that outside of work. Time to go back to some of my codependency books, I think, and do a little more work on myself now that I'm not devoting anything to saving my M.