WAS or what (2)

[roist]

Thanks for asking Z. Weekend was ok. Usual bag of mixed signs.

Friday the kids finished school, so we got a take away to picnic in a park. After eating the boys went off playing. I thought W would either clam up or follow boys. But no she stayed and chatted with me for an hour. Sometimes she is skimpy on eye contact but then she won the staring contest!

Saturday was busy, some together some apart.

Sunday I did my adventure race. I left early. She brought kids to see the finish and eat together afterwards. The afternoon I got in the pool with the kids and w disappeared. I found that strange but turns out she went to get ready to come into pool too. We had fun.

In short there have been some good interactions, but always interspersed with less good ones. I don't mean to undermine any positive signs, but they are just signs.

The good interactions seem to enhance the poor ones. I try to interact always the same positive way but ultimately an interaction depends on both of us.

She has said some stuff that may or may not be an insight on us. I have food for thought and a possible 180 to try.

Overall I am OK. I am re-concentrating on me. I will look for opportunities to improve the dynamics between us. I don't like snooping so if I can I am going to stop. I am not turning a blind eye but want to concentrate on other stuff for now.

Tomorrow night W was supposed to picnic with three friends (2 women and Mr inappropriate). Now we are bringing kids to open air cinema and Friday we are going to one of her friends for a BBQ. So their just the four adults private picnic seems to have become a with kids, me and another family added. I don't know or care why this changed. So looks like I will have another night out with him.

Then next Saturday we head off for a long weekend with the inlaws..

I am going to be busy for next month and W is involved in a lot of that. I will try add some apart activities but overall if W wants to do stuff together i will make the most of it. Sometimes she chooses (and usually asks to do it instead of being asked) to do something with me but is not in super form as if doesn't want to do it with me. That can be a bit of a downer at times, but I can handle it.

I had not planned on writing much or maybe not even posted at all. I want to concentrate on work and other stuff. I think this place is great. The support is super. The vets taking the time to help us in our struggles us awesome. However sometimes it is hard to read so many people struggling and/losing in their fight. But mostly I believe my situation will not change much soon and I will only be talking about signs etc. I am slow to type on my phone and I need to make the most of my time at work and at home.