I have just read up on your sitch. I am in a similar boat. I have my MLCer living at home with me too.
I know how hard it all is! I treat him like a house guest.
After BD my H went into serious replay. He just would go out and not say where he was going or when he'd be back. He made friends with two guys who were 50 but acted like they were 20. It left me with my worst fears: of being alone, of OW. I also have had to deal with my all my emotions toward my H who I used to always view as stable, honest and dignified.
This weekend, it hit me that he cannot even make himself happy. So how can I expect him to make me happy?
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
