It's Been Two Months Today

[DifRent]

Well, I didn't get enough advice from the vets before I saw her today, so I didn't send an email.

We sat down on the porch and talked instead, no fighting. I said she needed to stop saying "we broke up" and acknowledge this is a separation/divorce initiated solely by her. She agreed. I told her she was incredibly selfish to get a place lined up for herself without talking to me so we could both determine what we were each going to do. She started to argue, but backed down. I actually think from the tone of her response there was a bit of breakthrough in terms of her understanding just how selfish she's been. A very small one, but something.

Last night at the pub with some friends, I was relaying the story of how the OW came into our lives. One of the women there said, "She's a poacher." Meaning... she's one of those single lesbians who meets a seemingly happy couple and wants to steal that happiness for herself. So she befriends them, perhaps a bit too closely (I definitely felt that from the beginning), and figures out which one is a bit less satisfied than the other with her life/relationship, and thus more vulnerable to being "poached."

Now I see why in the beginning she kept saying she wanted to get to know me better - I guess so she could make her choice! Since she was spending so much time with my W on the real estate business, it was just a matter of time before she was able to identify the weak spots, and pounce.

I'm kind of sick to my stomach about all that. What kind of twisted person does any such thing? Had to spend a few minutes in the car with my W this afternoon and I said, "You know, I learned about an interesting lesbian phenomenon last night..." And after I was done explaining it, she said, "I don't think that's Catherine."

I said, "Well, I know ignorance is bliss, and you are so very blissfully ignorant right now. Just do your due diligence."

She was very quiet after that. But since she was driving, she had to wait to relay that information via text to the OW... IF she did at all, I can't be sure. If she did, I know I gave them more ammunition to be united against me, so not good. But if she didn't - or even if she did - I gave my W something to ponder. And I know she's got it stuck in her head now.

Wonder if I did the right thing...