Is there a bottom?

[bravo61]

Thanks Mr B. You're right I am resentful at times. Definitely something I need to work on.

Few updates: when I saw her on Father's Day at pickup, I told her I was praying for her(missing her dad). She said that she hates that day and immediately started to cry. I went to her and just hugged her (she hugged back) and said I was sorry. She mentioned that she wishes she had those 45 minutes back (she left hospital at my request 45 minutes prior to his death). I told her I was sorry for my part in that. Hugged her again (closed old this time) & left. Picked up flowers for the kids to give her at drop off (same afternoon)-just right thing to do.

Couple of times since then, she's accused me of trying to influence the kids into guilting her back because in her words "they've had problems" & it's worse after visiting with me. Of course they say the same things to me but I don't mention it except to say "I know it's tough to hear that".

I have a female friend that is gorgeous that wants to date me. Couple of times when she would pick up kids, I would leave at the same time dressed very nice (1x at 1130p). Kids have heard me talk to her confirming plans. The other day, she asked my S where I went after pickup. He said to his friends house & she asked if they had met her(no-I'm not ready to date yet).

At this occurrence^^, she told S that she was dating a doctor she works with (despite her promise to him she wouldn't date) & S would like him due to OM love of dirtbikes & video games. As S volunteered this info, my D (on her birthday) overheard it & melted down. "No daddy, that can't be right! She said they were just friends! How are we gonna be a family again? Please daddy, don't give up, save our family! Mama's worth it!!". She sobbed for 5 minutes.

I'll admit, I'm really hurt over this disclosure. In one of the emails regarding the kids she said "divorce is painful for everyone and hard to accept" & that she wants the kids "vet used to the circumstances". What a selfish, heartless b@$Ch!!

S did say I'm much more attractive than OM is. S saw a pic. The thought of her with another man just keeps running through my mind and it kills me. Well, she wanted a Doc and now she has one. What sux is that since they work together & see each other outside of work that's a lot of time to bond. Can't help but wonder if this was going on when I still lived back home & she was here. Or she coulda been planning it.