Me: 32 W: 29 T:8 M: 6 D4 S2 M - 8/2008 W is not happy - 1/2014 W wants D - 9/2014 W moved out - 11/2014 D filed - 1/23/2015 D'ed - 2/25/2015 Gave X the Letter - 11/10/2015
Sunday we went to the air soft war and had so much fun. I did way better than I thought I would and my son was so proud of me. My S didn't want my H to play but he was there and cooked out for the entire team, which was very nice.
Monday I spent the day with my sister doing girl stuff and my S and H went spent the day together. My H apologized again to our S and to explain how much stress he had been under when he told us he was "done" and never coming back. Our S told him he was sorry he was stressed out but that's no excuse to take it out on your family and he would have to earn his trust back.I'm so proud of my kid.
Tuesday I had a session with my coach. She gave me some good insight into male depression. She said when men feel depressed it usually shows up in the form of anger and when they feel overly stressed at work and not in control of every situation, they sometimes looked to what they can control...space and their relationship with their spouse.
Looking back over the last year I believe my H has suffered from depression. Then this last job was very stressful with millions of dollars on the line and it all came together for the perfect storm. My coach suggested some books for me to read and we discussed how to start a conversation with my H about going to the doctor some blood work and a check up.
He hates going to the doctor but I had the conversation and he agreed to go. I'm so glad. I just want us both to do everything possible to make our marriage better.
Wed we all went to a movie and today we stayed home and worked in the yard. I worked in my garden which was very relaxing.
In all things are going well. After my H goes to the doctor he said he is willing to look into going to a seminar or a couples session.
In all things are going well. After my H goes to the doctor he said he is willing to look into going to a seminar or a couples session.
Hi Teach,
Hey, that sounds like progress to me. Keep up the good work and stay positive.
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
*Hugs*
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
That all sounds great. Just a reminder to keep your expectations low and your movements slow. Just keep doing what's working.
Parenthetically, I'm so proud of how far you've come during this process. Go back and read your first posts and remember how hard it was for you to go one day without sending a text to your H. Now look where you are! No matter how this turns out, I believe that you are and will be a success story.
Teach, thank you for the update! It sounds like you had a great week. Just like Matt said, keep all expectations low, but it does seem like you are making great inroads on your journey. Good for you!
E
M 46 / H 43 T 24/M 18 S 4 11/6/2014 ILYBNILWY 1/16/2015 Living in separate bedroom 1/8/2016 H moved out
Thanks Bob! I feel going to the doctor is a good starting point.
Hello Teach!
You're welcome. As our good friend Matt pointed out: "Just a reminder to keep your expectations low and your movements slow. Just keep doing what's working."
This is hard to do, but you need to follow his advice.
I wish you all the best, Teach.
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Looks like things are moving in a good direction, happy for you teach. Just keep on the path and don't rush things. Continue to watch those expectations and let him figure things out.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
