I understand how you are feeling right now. We have all been there but I know that doesn't make it any easier for you. It will be difficult but you need to start taking care of yourself physically. Are you eating? Are you sleeping?

I would highly recommend you get one of the books asap. Try Barnes & Noble or your library.

Me:35 W:30
D:4 S:1
Bomb: 01/08/15, discovered EA & PA
In House Separation: 01/14/15
W moves out: 04/05/15
I tell OM's W about A: 04/15/15
W serves D papers: 06/19/15
Mediation: 09/16/15
D final: 12/01/15