I think a majority of her unhappiness is/was my negativity during her years as a Medical Student and Resident. I was "Mr. Mom" always taking care of the kids because her schedule was crazy. I won't lie and say that I'm not jealous of her career. Her career as an ER physician is very rewarding, whereas my job is a very "thankless" job. I'm sure seeing how confident and happy she was in her job made me feel irrelevant. That't not her fault, but my behavior didn't help. The stress of my 8-5pm job, her ever changing schedule, and taking care of the kids (4 & just turned 1 year old) when she wasn't around made me negative. I hate saying "resentful" but that's the truth when looking at it from the outside in.
After we were married and had our first child she went right into ER residency. There was never much time for just "us" to work on our relationship.
She thinks I can't change, especially after the turmoil the past 3 months. I want to change not only for my family, but more importantly myself. I get that its not all my fault, she never told me my negativity was bringing her positive feelings down. She claims she did, but I never picked up on the hints.
