Thanks everyone for the kind words and support. After my "AH-HA" moment with Jody and after therapy, I've started to put myself first as far as what I want to do. There's no doubt in my mind this will be tough and terrifying.
My emotions took over the best of me and destroyed any chance we had 3 months ago. I'm sure, just like everyone else here, if I could go back in time, I would have slapped my own self.
Stop saying you destroyed any chance you had. You can't possibly know that. There are surely many marriages that have gone on to be successful that had far worse damage than yours. Take the focus off your marriage and your relationship and put it on you.
Originally Posted By: RobS99
After yesterday, I started to "detach", I've toned down the social media "ties" with her (Not unfriend, but un-followed), removed her as a "favorite" on my cell contacts (this way she isn't the first person to pop up), and have no reason to send a text message. The only interaction will need to be about the kids.
Keep reading the homework. Detaching is about aeparating your emotional wellbeing from your wifes actions, thoughts, and wishes. It isn't about cutting her out of your life.
Originally Posted By: RobS99
During this separation, I've asked myself "Should I put my ring back on?" one side of me says "Yes, this will show her you DO care and want to be better". The other side of me says "No, its not about the relationship right now".
Don't decide this based on what she will think. Decide this based on your belief. Some people go both ways on here. Me, I have mine on, because I believe in our vows and our marriage. Others take their ring off. But choose for you - not to get a reaction from her.
