My W has reduced her emails to me down to four word replies, she stopped addressing them to me personally months ago and now just heads them with "hey". It's as if using my name would be too painful for her (mind reading I know)
I mentioned in one of my earlier threads about how her language had become very prozake (or very formal if you will) which is likely a reaction to the language I use. She uses my name now, but back before BD she didn't need to. It's like she's doing the friendly neighbor on me.
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I look at her replies as going through her own mental/emotional version of Wonka. She has an outcome that she wants and an emotional protection system in place - that is trying to protect that outcome. All of her replies get filtered through that system - using my name may give me hope, or may be too painful for her, or some other reason that I can't even think of. But it has a reason.
This I can relate to. Any and all communications from her are about a specific topic based in practicality. I know that's what we should be doing as part of the process and it's a reflection of that and I can relate.
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We have to view our system as having its own agenda too so without Wonka, we just write what we "think or feel" not realizing that our system has probably tainted it with it's own flavor of need.
Yes, I get this as well. Interesting that at the end of my last thread the short text I sent to my WW RE surprising me with S9 created a bit of a storm. Funny how just a couple of words that you normally wouldn't think twice about using can provoke such a reaction. Sad but true.
Last edited by NDY; 06/26/1503:17 PM.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
