Need to stop pushing

[asitis]

Do not mention anything like that to W. Asking how she is doing, how her work is doing, inviting her in the house are all no-no's. I learned the hard way. Anything that is perceived to be personal or in the area of personal space tends to make the walls grow thicker and higher instantly.

Plus it makes you appear overly EAGER to see her like L'Pepe chasing Penelope the cat.

Now my W is not in an A, but it is interesting that my DB coach is encouraging me to engage in "hey, how are you doing?" and then listen if she wants to talk but move on to focus on the kids if she is reluctant. It also has lead to her being more light and open since I started. Now, there are times when one of us is in a hurry. You say it is a no-no, but I think it may depend on the particulars of the sitch and the R. Again, my W is a WAW going through MLC not a WW, so that may be why the no-no advice you are giving NDY.

I agree that the invite to come in might be too eager, but I'd be interested if you are making a blanket statement or something just specific to when there is an A in the case of things like asking how are you doing how are things going in a light friendly manner?