My paternal grandmother was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes when she was in her early 60s. She took 30 lbs. off and her Dx was ditched and she lived the rest of her life without diabetes. My former FIL was also able to eradicate the symptoms of it, merely by eating better and eliminating alcohol.
Good luck!
Re Ashley... I truly hope you aren't feeling guilty about telling her to knock it off. If I were in your shoes, I'd do the same thing. You have nothing to apologize for. Sure you're her mom and you have her back, but she's an adult now and something tells me you'd avoid friends who weren't going to provide you with some level of comfort right now, right?
Back when my other grandma was getting sick and at the end of her life, my mom and late aunt were making lots of trips from DC to the north shore of MN to take care of things. It was really stressful on both families, and it needed to be done. My brother had a lot of traits that Ashley has, and for whatever reason, his empathy chip malfunctioned when it was most needed. When my mom has been unavailable, he was the one who tuned into station WME non-stop. He'd escalate his self absorbedism into her world, and most of the time, she'd put up with it. I was 30 and he was 24 - well enough to know better. One day, I could hear the explosion all the way to Colorado. He pushed that "it's all about me button" one too many times and my mom UNLOADED. It really should never have gotten to that point - she should have told him from the get go, "My mom is dying and your aunt and I are trying to tie up loose ends and having to travel 1200 miles every other week. I need you to be mindful of my stress and zip that selfish lip." OK, STFU. I don't think he ever forgot it, but he sure pressed his luck at times. My sister and I are just smart enough to dial everything down when mom needs extra support. Like now...
I swear to God, Barb, if he were still alive this year, I'm sure he would have escalated when my aunt passed away in April. He had an uncanny knack for pushing my mom to the brink when she needed support the most.
I'm not sure if that fits Ashley's M.O., but sometimes you have to tell it like it is. When someone oversteps a boundary, it's up to you to enforce it. And you did.
Personally, if she were my sister (not daughter), I'd probably have to pull her aside and tell her, "you know, Mom is uber stressed right now. And you complain all the time. It's emotionally draining, so stop it. Leave her the f*ck alone. It would probably do you some good to start focusing on the things that are going well in your life, and I better not hear that nothing is..."
I know Ashley is a help when you need it the most, so that's working in her favor. But you don't have to go to the same extreme as my mom did to get her needs met either.
Hugs and good luck!
Bets
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
