Oh, and I think maybe one big reason I have started feeling this way is because of my therapist, she seems to be pushing me towards getting out. I know that s@cks.
Tell your therapist that you aren't ready and that you want him or her to stop pushing for now. Do it in an I appreciate that you are trying to help but for now, I am prepared to pay the emotional price for my choice. I want to work on (1) how to reduce that price given my choice; (2) things I need to deal with the be a better upnorth; and (3) helping me minimize the impact to my S.
Show them the chapter from DB (the chapter from DR might provoke a defensive reaction from some therapists who have thinner skin about such things) on why Divorce is not the answer. Tell him or her that this is why you are choosing to hang in there for now. Ask them to respect your views and values on this.
If they keep pushing (remember you may be hearing them say get out, when they may be pushing you to deal with something you aren't willing to - a lot of my therapist friends spend a lot of time in therapy dealing with frustrations and advice on clients who turn their pushing for the client to face something they are resisting into hearing the therapist as saying something else), consider a new therapist. We don't want to just get someone who will soothe us and confirm our biases, but that doesn't mean that some therapists are bad fit for a particular person.
Me: 50 W:43 S6, S3 M: 12 yrs. T: 17 M is bad & Not happy Bomb Mar '14 S 5 Feb '15 D Bomb 13 Apr '15 (but "no hurry") DB Coach May '15 Wants proceed on D Aug '15 Starting 1-on-1 negotiations Sept '15
