That being said, it is very clear that he is completely unwilling to have any self reflection on his own actions right now and does not see how he up is also doing things that don't contribute to building trust. If I could not tell he was going to be receptive to what I was saying, I backed off.
YUP - he is right on that VICTIMS triangle - racing around and around, not figuring out that he needs to get off.
Best thing for you to do is to stay off it too, cause no good will come from chasing him round and round either.
