Summer of Growth and Acceptance

[V2pt0]

I know this does not fully rest on me and I need the help of H, but one of the things that worries me is that I feel what R I currently have left with H is turning bitter and hateful for him. I know I am mind reading, but that is what I feel through his actions. I need to make sure that I stay lovingly detached. I don't want to find myself in that same space.

H and I really hardly ever fought, so the current tension that we have is very new to me. We both buried things instead of confronting, which helped to build up years of resentment. I was in the process of what I think was a 180 by trying to for once to walk into the conflict instead of running. The problem is that my H is in full run mode. With him tantruming, shutting down and raging, I am left to avoid and not engage and shut down. How to I keep the loving part in this detachment and still seem soft? It makes it feel as if all connection is gone, but maybe this is where we both need to be.