hold on! - 10

[u-turn]

V - apologies - really?

First, you are always welcome and I ALWAYS value what you write - you help me every day. Thank you for that.

Second, like I said, I only know what I know, and the things you are writing about are things that I didn't even know I didn't know. and I do love to learn and am in awe by this wisdom that you show. I can talk about how these things relate to me, but to actually add to what you have written - not so much. It does open my eyes to what may be happening inside my head though.

You do clear this up for me a little. I have often taken on feeling accountable for W's actions (and in my life, other people's actions too). I recognize this.

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I also recognize this one. Maybe this is what is described here as dropping the rope, but I have let go (and in a way I fear that I have gone too far). I am doing things only for myself and kids. I now sometimes (last night) actually pity and feel sorry for W. I have now learned to be self-sufficient, the kids know that they can rely on me (and only me if push came to shove). I do everything for myself and the kids, and at times W just sits and mopes. Have I pulled back too far? I feel good, but there's that guilt thing again. What's this about? the real question - have I pulled the kids away from her? Early in this situation, W accused me of trying to do this.