I was wondering about the Retrouaville getaway and how you guys felt about it.
It goes to show you that all of this NEVER about you. All of that angst is all on us and we're wading through that chit like swimming in molasses.
We all look to you, the LBS, as a beacon that reassures us that you're still there while we're flailing about in those deep, dark waters. I still loved Ms. Wonka throughout my crisis and it was comforting to me to see her there.
If Ms. Wonka was a strong Stander like you, I would have found my way back to her when my fog lifted. Ah well.
We both came away with very strong positive feelings about it ... are we all better, no .... but there is now 'hope' as so many shared, W also said she has hope ... we also shared that this point last year, sure we could have used the weekend but it would have been ineffective, reading couples body language and the amount one spouse was putting into it vs the other you could see it was not probably sinking in as desired. I will say W was VERY engaged and for the first time I felt that "I am committed to this M" talk she gave back in Mar ... I actually witnessed it this weekend ... again .. believe none of what they say and 50% of what they do ... came into play, in her book she wrote about how she could earn/rebuild trust ... big bold underlined words "ACTIONS not WORDS"
I always have felt I'm the lighthouse, and yes .. throughout her crisis and even more-so now she looks towards me for guidance ... I realize somethings I can gently nudge .. others she must figure out on her own but I am here ... I think that part is very important to her. She shared the OM draw was he was nice and interested in her. Hard to hear for me but I was frustrated and angry (there is some truth tucked up in there)... and learning the tools from the weekend she and I now know we tried to share feelings but the way we did that ... neither one of us was listening .. more about our own agendas rather than the other persons feelings.
As we have shared ... those lifeless shark eyes, were gone for most the weekend .. there was one session they returned and she went off on this crazy tangent ... but she did return quickly ... was really strange watching this and I realized that it must have been horrible to LIVE that way as long as she did.
