Oh my gosh, this forum doesn't stop to amaze me, it's such a blesssing
RosaLinda, YES !!!!!!!!!! the OW are devastating & distroying me inside He is now on his 3rd different one. 2 from his work. He is slowly getting through all the traffic control/stop sign holder girls from work and Im sure soon they will end up knowing or comparing texts and info...gosh they all work together.
The bandaid theory is so right. He always were a type to want to feel superior & liked by everyone & feel important & look good all the time, even when he was with me, it was a major, very important thing for him.That's why I think that him having the brand new camper & boat to show off is extremely important because when I ask him to give me more time to adjust for him to bring his OW there....he FREAKS out BAD !! It sure makes sense, cause without those things he feel less superior.
It baffles me to know that there is women like that in the world, I would NEVER go that low, I love being educated, independant and strong (most days at the moment but getting my old strenght back slowly)
RosaLinda, don't be ashamed to have snooped, we all do it and it is one of my goal to completely stop because it hurst me way more then it helps me. Today is day: 50 of BD and I have to talk myself out of snooping every single day.
I do feel that those women are better than me some days but I know that it is not true.
I love the saying of " natural death" it has happen at least with the 2 first ones.
The thing that I know he doesn't communicate with these girls is that he wants to be alone with no responsibilites & no one to report to & he certainly not moving in with anyone. He wants total freedom and they are looking for a longterm relationship when is not at all. They will be surprised when they realize that he wants nothing serious.
I'm so glad he is out of my hair while he is doing his craze MLC.
I feel stronger everyday, I started to plan for more GAL things, like Kayaking, camping, Im even thinking about a trip out of the country for our first xmas without him, just for me and my girls. Exciting things, I feel happy about this.
PS: Next June I will be in NY RosaLinda......We should meet
I wanted to share my new favorite saying: Be soft Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness.
Things are very fresh for you. Time may be eeking by at a snail's pace, but in time, WITH WORK, you will come out of this better and stronger than you have ever been.
My biggest initial suggestion is to latch onto what the vets, the ones who have been through the wringer and are now on the other side, and to listen and DO what they say. (I see Cadet and RosaLinda and Starsky.) Your mind will try to play tricks on you about your situation being different, but your best bet to success is to follow the format of those who have blazed the trail before you.
I'm guessing Cadet's welcome posts now have quite a few helpful links? Spend some time really researching the information on this site. Read and digest the stories of others. Learn from their successes and failures.
All the best,
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
While there is no excuse for cheating on one's spouse, have you thought about what went wrong in your marriage? What mistakes did you make? What things about yourself do you think you need to change? What things about yourself do you love and want to be sure you DON'T change?
I am not asking in the context of what you think you need to do in order to win your husband back, am I asking about YOU.
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
Patientman, I never thought about it really, I know a few things he mentioned & I agree, he only mentioned it once he had left I find everything so overwhelming!!!!
Patientman, I never thought about it really, I know a few things he mentioned & I agree, he only mentioned it once he had left I find everything so overwhelming!!!!
We have a big project ahead of us, then, but only if you are willing to do the work. Are you on board?
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
