Friend - "Glad to hear about you two. W - Yes, I wanted you to know, She is very special.
After deliberating on this. I made some tacticle errors:
1. Calling her after receiving the text (with photo of kids)
Why did I do that? Hmmm....Anger and fear, my two most loyal friends these days. It did nothing to clear anything up, it was obviously a misdirected text to a friend announcing her new romance. The friend was someone who she HATED and yet she felt like she "had to tell her". This friend worked with both my W and OW. Reading it made me feel ambushed and sick to my stomach. It was like I was tricked into reading it becuase there was a photo of my kids so of course I read it and as soon as I did - bushwacked .....AGAIN. Lesson learned..... I will not call her again and get sucked back into the drama.
#2. Letting it upset me the way it has. I will not let it ruin my weekend. I will delete the text and that will be that. I will not give it any more head space.
#3. Letting her yell at me "I DONT' SEND YOU ANY TEXTS" which is a non sensical statement, she texts me and I text her all the time.
#4. I think I ended it gracefully as I could, with a breezy "OK then, bye and just hung up the phone. I didn't argue or get angry, just said bye and hung up.
Godang that made me feel small and bad and ambushed all over again.
I am guessing that for the rest of my life I will feel anger and hostility at her. I am sorry to admit it because those are two of the basest feelings - animals feel those and I would like to think I am a little but above animals but that is reality.
Over and over and over again I get my nose rubbed into this chit and each time it hurts. Does it hurt any less, I don't know but it always hurts. I am able to function now, get out of bed, go to work cook supper etc... so in that respect I am better. But bitter .... yes. Still very bitter.
At this moment, if I could sign the papers to divorce her I would do it. I just don't have the papers in front of me.
So now my S9 just called me, asked me what I was doing, told him I was going to the movies, he said what movie, I told him and my W overheard and said "Oh yes, Mommy will like that movie." Personality transplant apparently had taken place.
