TLEE86 Part IV

[TLEE86]

Hey V, Pink thanks for checking in. I just got home after a month in the field. Feels so nice to have a hot shower and a/c again. It got well over 100 and we were just sucking out there moving around and sweating every second your awake. I have a 3 day weekend so it feels good to relax for a change.

Honestly not a whole lot to write, so I'm just writing.

It feels weird coming on this board now. So many people that I used to follow stopped writing, or write less and no one really has a whole lot to say..so I see all these new names and it [censored]. I wish no one else would go through this so it [censored] seeing all these new people going through this, when a year ago they probably never thought they would.

Ive been contemplating very seriously about getting out of the Army, and starting fresh. My wife has been with me every step of the way in my career and it just doesnt feel the same without her. And the Army is changing, no more deployments and if we do deploy its all just BS security missions. The hard charging, kick down the door days are long over- might be weird for some of you to read that, but most guys want to deploy again. It gives us a sense of purpose, a reason to exist- not just train to train so this Garrison life is weird.

Getting out also helps me close this chapter of my life that has brought so much joy and so much pain at the same time. Might feel very good to just start over. Above all, it'd give me a chance to see WAW more often, possibly be in the same city...

But there are so many opportunities that they Army is giving me this next year. And its very difficult to turn them down. Id like to wait one more year and then get out, after Ive taken all these awesome opportunities but idk if i want to or if the M will survive, yes its already "dead" like some people put it, but idk.

Things with W have been strange. One week she says she's ready for a D because were both in limbo and that she's ready to move on without me, and this week she tells me she misses the dogs and get this....she actually put her ring back on because she was "feeling things" and posted a picture of her wearing her ring saying she "forgot how beautiful this ring was" and of course cried a few more times. Don't worry---she took the ring back off again.

She's so confusing and I know she's confused, and all that but when she did that it made me 1) happy 2) think of Z and her H and its like...dont they realize that you cant just take the ring on and off? That its not so..nonchalant and casual?

As far as me, theres this pretty cool training opportunity run by some civilians in the local area that I want to go to. Its all about small arms marksmanship and clearing houses properly etc etc but it costs like $700....i guess thats my next goal and the next thing I want to do so...start saving.

Im sorry i havent been commenting on peoples threads..its just weird seeing all these new "Faces" and i feel lost going into it already but il try. Have a great weekend!