Roommates for the Next Two Months

[DifRent]

Cali, thank you for this beautiful response. Everything you say is true. You have walked this path much longer than I have, and you still have hope. But you don't cling to it. I pray I get to where you are soon enough.

This morning I left without saying anything to go to Mass and just pray that novena and other prayers in the quiet of the chapel. When I returned, she was gone... but she arrived about an hour later. When it was time to head out to see my Stephen Minister, I simply called up to her, "See you later."

And she jumped up from her desk... "Wait, where are you going?" She came down the stairs.

"Look, I know you're mad at me, upset with me, fine, I can't help that. But you just left this morning without saying anything, and I wanted to make a plan for us to go to Trader Joe's, but you were gone, without a word. And where are you going now? Which car are you taking?"

Very calmly, I just said, "Which car do you need?"

She said, "You can take the big one... where are you going, when will you be back?"

"I have a meeting, and I should be back around three... well maybe later, since one of us has to go to Trader Joe's."

"Okay, okay... you know I have plans tonight." (Tried REALLY HARD not to roll my eyes.) But I should be here till four or four-thirty, okay babe?"

Her panic about where I was going was new... I mean, she often asks, less often lately. But this was like an emergency. I think since yesterday was a "cake eating" day... I was around all day, she got to talk to me about whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted, even got a physical touch fix in... and today I did a 180 on that. Threw her off.

Although we are on our way to physical separation, and she is so eager for it, I feel underneath my dread a certain calm about it. I am the lighthouse. There may well be that time down the road when she is snowed under by the crazy, and by God's grace, I will be more of a rock than ever.

Thanks for all the prayers, and your assurances of how importance our faith is.