Well...I think I finally arrived. I think I've hit the point where I just don't care what happens to the M. Sure, I feel sad that it ended but from here on in this is all about me and my journey. I wish my H well...and I think he is a fool.
Somehow, I feel like I'm able to engage more with the world and the people around me as I am today.
On Monday I went to an open mike night with a guy I met at a hiking Meetup thing a few weeks ago. He's probably 20 years older and nice company...so when he invited me I figured what the hey, I guess I can do that sort of thing. Though I have no idea what it means in the general area of "male-female relations". And I'm ok with it.
Today I also got a message from a younger, apparently smitten guy who attended the hike last weekend. I'll refrain from posting what he wrote, but it left me in stiches, poor guy. Actually, it occurs to me that I've been complimented (or propositioned!) by far more random guys in the last 6 months, than in the entirely of my 15 year R...so I guess I'm sending out something different. I'll confess it's a confidence boost and has me more curious about the dating scene. I think I am ready.
What's even nicer though, is that I will go to it with a greater understanding of who I really am, what I have to offer, and what I want from a R. While I would have preferred to come to this place through a different means, I have to say that I'm pretty happy with where I am at these days.
Newcomers - I know I found it hard to read "it will get better" when I first arrived here. I clearly remember thinking I didn't want to be here a year later. But the reality is you should take as long as you need. This time is a gift and if you treat it as such, you will reap the rewards. There's peace in me that hasn't existed in a long, long while and I think you'll find it, too, if you linger on the boards for a bit longer yet.
H 37 Me 36 Together 15 years Married 5 years No kids BD Apr 2014 H moved out 2 Jun 2014
