The Dance of Uncertainty Continues...

[PigPen]

Thank you both for stopping by, I've simply had a miserable day of missing my W.

I think detachment is a myth in my case as two simple texts, and driving through her new town have turned me into a basket case all day. I wrote an email to her this morning that I didn't send. I didn't send it but I had to write it. So much for yesterday's epiphany of holding space...

ALL DAY I've been seeing her car here in town, waiting for her to walk in the door of my office (she would come almost every day), and missing the hell out of her. I keep telling myself that this will pass in time, but here we are six months in and it seems like yesterday that she was an integral part of my life and future.

Maybe I did put her on a pedestal and think that my life would be ok as long as she was in it. I definitely didn't address my own challenges, and maybe I needed to be on my own to make things that were screwed up me unscrewed up.

I'm grateful for the changes, so many positive changes. And I mean it when I say I'm truly grateful and can't imagine going back to how I was living before with her. But damn if I don't think we can build on what we did have and make it what we always wanted now that we've both done so much work on ourselves.

I may need to come back on rant later, today is kicking me in the backside.