25years, Job Bob. Thank you so much for the thoughtful words and advice. I am doing much better. My therapist gave me a book to read, Codependent No More. It has brought to light a lot of things for me and has told me I do not need to be this way and what you guys have told me above is spot on because this books says the same thing.
It says you can detach and still be nice and accepting of the person or thing but don't get caught up in THEIR problems and make them yours, it is not yours to control, help, worry about the only focus is on myself. I am not quite half way through the book, can't wait to read more.
With the book and you guys having my back I think I am going to make it finally! With or without H.
