Bingo! You are of course right. I am still attached (I kid myself otherwise) and I didn't like being non communicative. Yes, I am a fixer who has always dealt with all the problems in the house (is that controlling?) and have kept peace when my S kicks off.
So, back to basics for me.
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015
