It's difficult with the kids, especially with my son being disabled. It's not easy just to start GAL activities as my S's autism can go from good to extreme in seconds and I need to be there to control his temper.
I understand what you're saying, but you do work from outside the home a lot of days, right? So you don't NEED to be with him 24 hours of every day. I'm not suggesting you need to abandon the kids to the W all the time, but I do think you need to start injecting some level of mystery from your W. Can't you go out after work one night a week?
Originally Posted By: Huddy
So what have I done for me? Well, I've got back into regular exercise/weights. Today, the weather improved and me and the kids went off to the park not inviting W, so that was good. I do have a night out planned in a couple of weeks.
These are good. How about on a personal/emotional level? What kinds of behaviors are you working on?
Originally Posted By: Huddy
Yes, I have been trying to fix the marriage, but haven't found that LRT has been having the desired effect in that she just gets even more aggressive and hurtful. That's when she said she was taking the kids away.
Will review my actions and revise.
I'm not saying LRT is required. Only you can decide if you tried it long enough to really know that it failed - and if it did, then there's no reason to keep it up. But what I do believe is that distancing yourself and not pursuing (in whichever way you tried it) is only one part of the puzzle. You can't just fall off the earth for 3 months, come back and expect that W wants to R. The real key to saving the marriage is actual personal growth and change. The LRT is just a tool to help give you the space to implement those changes.
