My goodness. The pace that the threads come in. So much pain. I feel for you all.
I have noted that there is a lot of focus on WS being willing to end things and have NC. I get that. So you keep DBing until the WS is ready to end and come back. THEN you expect NC.
In my situation there is no 1 OM. There is the internet. There are probably 4 or 5 chat buddies. She is addicted to the "high" of what is new and exciting. Also addicted to the need for affirmation that was not being fulfilled by our dysfunctional marriage.
How do I approach this when the OP is a more of a thing than a he??
Last
Sorry you are here.
Online A's are basically EA's ... and its a drug your W is high on at the moment. Does not matter if she is with 1 or 4 as you have suggested as all these men are suppling her with her fix, and at the moment she is not going to be willing to give this up since ... currently there are no consequences in doing so.
You have to DB just to get your head right, to start rebuilding you ... let her do her Online thing for now, you can not control it regardless right? When you start the basics on DBing you will begin to figure out how to put boundaries up and stick to them
As far as NC ... in your case .. I would not even think about that ... what will need to happen .. and trust me its tough, she will have to get off that grid, its a drug/community that she has become intertwined with, all wrapped up in it and oblivious to the pain and hurt she is causing people in her REAL life. Online she is as fun and cool as she wants to be ... in RL .. not so much .. its a tough drug to get off of.
Put the focus on you for now, get to a place where you act from strength not emotion, you will start seeing the benefits once you arrive there.
