My L rang today. She will be speaking to his L tomorrow. I have expressed my wishes clearly and I hope she will manage to convey them:

I am happy for our L's to work in the 'spirit' of collaboration, but I don't want to fund a series of meetings where my L will have to travel.

I am happy for us to sell the marital home, but only as part of a full financial settlement. I am happy to initiate the financial settlement process.

Divorce isn't what I want and I don't intend to file. If H wants to file, that will be his responsibility.

She said, so shall I clarify with his L how we are proceeding and whether it is his intention to file for D? I said no - I don't want 'us' to be talking about D at all, because that isn't what I want. Please merely confirm that I am initiating settlement of finances as part of selling the marital home.

She respects my wishes and took all this on board, but I am finding I need to be specific about what I do and don't want. I get the feeling that I may not be proceeding in a way she is used to.

Oh well, we'll see how this goes.....T xx

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus