My Mom is dating again, and this is great and she is very happy. My step dad has been dead for 4 years, and since then my Mom has been VERY dependant on me. It was draining at times and at times I think it put a strain on my M becuase I allowed it to stress me out which I then took that stress out on my H.
Well now that my Mom is dating again, she does not call me as much, my mom use to call me all day every day, her BF took her to grocery store (something I use to do), her BF is keeping her busy they are double dating and my mom is having a ball!!!
This is something I was praying for, that my mom found companionship, that she was not so dependant on me for her entertainment, I had to be her BFF, her D, her taxi, her bank...it fliped our relationship where I was like the Mother.
NOW I'm feeling a little used and ignored, like now that she has BF she don't want to spend any time with me. I think she brings up some child hood issues becuase when my mom got a BF when I was a child, I feel I was ignored as a child.
I then turned this around and told myself I was there for her how and when she needed me to be and now she has what she was missing...
I'm not going to address this with my Mom, she is in a new relationship and having a BLAST and she really deserves it.
Now I have even more time on my hands to GAL, to work on Me, and I can release the guilt I use to feel when I could not do everything my Mom wanted me to do, when I had other things to do...when I was spending time with my H or H and S14 and would feel like everytime we needed to inlcude my Mom or I would feel a little guilt...but I also feel a little ignored (that is the child in me). I need to let that go, and release that pain from child hood.
Before BD, I don't think I would have been able to "think thru" this shift in relationship with my Mom. I would have been "distant" to her because of how I was feeling ignored, instead of embracing that she is happy, and begin an adult and recalling how it is at the start of a new relationship when all you can think about is that person and wanting to spend time with that person. Now I can smile and realize my realtionship with my mom can be less stressfull and that we can spend FUN time together when we want to and not because she needs me to do something for her.
But that lil girl inside of me hopes she don't forget all about me.
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
