Yesterday, a friend of mine who is at the end of a very nasty divorce and custody battle sent me a text wherein he said he was heartbroken and despondent - he had a busy day, but really just wanted to stay in bed.
I am having that kind of morning right now - brokenhearted and despondent. Last night, the W came with my son and me to visit family that came into town for dinner out and a minor league baseball game. I'm not sure why - she spent half the dinner texting and making phone calls, and the bulk of the game arguing with me.
I am starting to feel as if there is no point to my DB efforts. She is panicked about money, wants to lease the house in September. By then, she wants separate places. She is "not coming back to me," she's said a thousand times, despite the fact I am not asking her to. The OW is all she can think about, their future together, and the financial resources she can provide for new business ventures between them.
Here I am, wanting to be that calm lighthouse in the midst of her crazy, but really, I'm just brokenhearted and overwhelmed... currently looking for work without the slightest bit of motivation to do anything, having to move our kids out of the house in the next few weeks and make sure they are settled, needing to figure out new living arrangements - and hoping she doesn't try to screw me over in the process. The one person who promised to love, protect, and take care of me... she's been replaced by this cold-hearted puppet of the OW.
I know couples have come back from worse. I just don't see much hope for this now... and if this is who she is, I don't see the point. I need to know there's hope for me and a new life beyond this pain, but I'm not feeling it today. Definitely a day for burying myself under the covers.
Last edited by Cadet; 06/09/1501:39 PM. Reason: Links
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
