No, it's not because you are too abstract and philosophical. I've wanted to respond but didn't think I could do so in a compassionate enough way, so I didn't say anything.
Newpand, I know this is so hard and that you are hurting. I'm sorry for that. And I know that depression is debilitating. I don't recall-- are you getting treated?
I worry that your mindset seems to be placing all the blame on your W, giving her so much power over your feelings. And the extent of your responsibility seems to be that you "made a mistake" in marrying her. I worry because there is so much more to it than just marrying the "right" person, and that if you are not able to look deep inside and see what your role was in the M, and take responsibility for your own feelings and actions, that you will simply repeat this pattern.
It is no one else's job to make us happy. And we cannot be a true partner in a R if we are not happy and whole ourselves. What work are you doing on yourself, to find happiness within yourself? You seem no where near ready to start dating. I'm curious why you are. You've had a string of pretty long term relationships. Perhaps it's time to step back and work on you before entering another one.
Good luck to you. Also, if you want more people to comment on your thread, it would be good to comment on others'.
