thank you for articulating something so well that captures how I feel.
Funny choice of words.
HOW YOU FEEL!
Perhaps your feelings are lying to you as well.
Perhaps your feelings aren't truth either.
In time you may discover all this time you are spending on trying to save your wife was wasted energy. That your wife really wasn't capable of repentance and has a become a person your really shouldn't be around or want to ever be with again. In time you may discover a better life without her in it and find a new relationship or even marriage that enriches your life beyond your wildest dreams and to a point you'll actually appreciate the freedom your selfish almost narcissistic wayward then ex-wife gave you at the end of this ordeal.
"Feelings" aren't truth. The way you and your wife feel today will not be how either of you feel a year from now, let alone 10 years from now.
What is truth?
Without getting religious on you....why does the truth matter here. Because the truth in your relationship is that you took vows to one another to love each other in sickness and health and in good times and bad. Your vows aren't dependent on what she does or doesn't do for you. They just are...a truth. You and your wife should live up to those vows despite your feelings because it's the right thing to do and it would be the best thing for your son, statistically speaking for his longterm emotional, financial, and educational success. By fighting for you marriage and family you are modeling for your son what "doing right" and "living up to your commitments/vows" mean and how far you're willing to go to save your wife from making the mistake of her life.
Truth: There is always hope.
Truth: People are not disposable. Your wife is lost and being incredibly hurtful but she remains worth fighting for because unlike the behavior she is modeling, people aren't to be thrown away just so you can be happy. Happy is not as important as truth, living up to your commitments and doing what is right.
Truth: When someone casts you aside....go. Once she divorces you and free you from your covenants you are under no obligation to maintain a workable relationship with her. You model for your son that you don't have to put up with people that abuse you for the sake of everyone else's happiness. YOU matter.
Another truth. You don't deserve this. Nobody does. But you will be OK how ever this ends up.
Last edited by Cadet; 06/08/1506:21 PM.
The internet is 90% complaining and entitlement and I hate it because I deserve better!
