Confused as to which direction I should go?

[bjudge]

I had actually visited this forum over a year ago looking for advice concerning my W but quit because I felt as if I was over thinking everything. However, little over a year later and I am beginning to rationalize that it is time to end the marriage or at least set some expectations for it to continue.

Long story short....3-4 years ago W began becoming distant, spending a lot of time away from the home, etc... Denied affair and I could never find any evidence. We had a number of relationship talks during this time. One point W moved out for 6 weeks. Moved back in and indicated that she was committed to us and that I was her "everything". I feel like she is all talk and no action and it has caused me to think about life on my own.

The only reason I haven't done anything before now is because of fears listed below...

1. If I set hard guidelines, then she will leave as once before.
2. She will find someone who makes her happy and I fear of having jealously feelings thinking that it should be me leading me into depression.
3. We have a great sex life. I fear that I will not find someone who satisfies me and again, she will share this with someone else and it just seems unfair.

I plan on having a sit down talk with her in two weeks. I have been writing in a journal now for a few weeks so that I can keep my thoughts together and really understand where I am coming from.

Any help/support/advice would be greatly appreciated.