That lady singing - is she fat?

[Pyrite]

Hey Py, hope you're doing well. I read my old threads the other night. I swear I was saying mostly the same things you are when I was 4-5 months in.

It definitely gets easier. Months 1-3 are like the end of the world. Months 4-8 are uncomfortable, but bearable. I think I've reached a place that's actually comfortable, but still has a lot of sorting, baggage, and some regret.

Looking forward to the next level in another six months, year, etc. I know there will always be some loss, but it's nice to know it does get easier.

For what it's worth, I've been so filled with joy and love lately. It's really cool. I am reading the book I mentioned by Dr. Joy Browne, just the forward and chapter one so far but it is SPEAKING to me. It has to do with how fantasies destroy our lives (tying nicely into my binge on expectation, control, and even addiction).

Anyway, I just find myself welling up with good feelings a lot, and it's like "who is this man". Not blaming my W or my M, just sayin' I was suicidal for several years towards the end. I am so grateful to have been given so much joy. Just had to share a little with my man Py.

Thanks Zeus - really need to crash, sleep. Teething, L-ing, WW spew, etc has exhausted me this week. I am looking forward to next week - holiday. Get back to ya. I've had an epiphany that has changed my life, well at least for tonight anyway.

Enjoy your joy my friend.