GB, I'm not sold on this strategy just yet. I don't know if there is enough meat on the bone for me to fully emerge from my shell. I know you're proposing a more evolved approach though, a constant distance-pursuit dance. I think a time may come for that, but I just don't see the hurry.
I don't really feel that I've gone completely dark, nor do I intend to. STBX and I are still communicating every day, albeit within my boundary. (BTW-15 minutes after I called her back this morning, she tried to FaceTime with me even though she knew I had an appointment). She still sees and hears about me being an amazing dad. She sees that I'm healthy and happy through our physical interactions because of the kids. It appears that this current approach might be working. More importantly, it's helping me personally navigate through this battlefield. What's the harm in sticking with it for a bit more?
Who knows? She could still be messing around with OM. OR she might even have moved on to another OM. (It might be time to consult my intel.) Either of these would mean that she doesn't believe in the changes I've made or just isn't really interested in reconciling anyway. Or both.
But, I'm just thinking out loud here. I do appreciate all the nuanced suggestions because I do believe that each sitch is different and requires a little improv along the way, just like all of life does. I'm not interested in being right, I'm just interested in what's best for my kids and I in the long run.
Me:35 W:30 D:4 S:1 Bomb: 01/08/15, discovered EA & PA In House Separation: 01/14/15 W moves out: 04/05/15 I tell OM's W about A: 04/15/15 W serves D papers: 06/19/15 Mediation: 09/16/15 D final: 12/01/15
