[sandi2]

Hi Angels, so sorry you find yourself in this mess. You will have plenty of company here on the board.

Do i confront?

What do you wish to accomplish by confronting her? Is it to let her know that you know? B/c confrontation, alone, will not change what she's doing. Unless you are ready for a showdown, my advice is to hold off until you have much more DBing under your belt. Once she knows that you know....you will have to be very tough, b/c the last you need is for her to realize you know about her A and that you are not doing anything about it. Know what I mean?

A lot of WW's immediately announce they want a D, if confronted. In other words, things usually become worse, which the LBH is not prepared to handle. You are already in shock, so I say to wait... for a while, anyway.

How should i do this while making it known i want to still attempt to fix our M?

If you have read my three threads about help for a newcomer LBH who has a WW, then you will know that a WW should wonder how you feel about things (especially after discovering the A). She needs to wonder what you may do. So, IMO, you should not be so fast in assuring her of anything, at the moment. Otherwise, she will try to have the best from both men.