Letting Go Part VI

[DJin]

I'm at mid-April in yer story thread. Catching up slowly...

I see a lot of growth in you. You and I are on about the same timeline -- signs of big trouble in Oct and then bigger probs in Dec/Jan with separation and D discussions/actions. I read where your thoughts are at in a certain month and I think, "yup....yup...that's where I was then, too..." Then in a later month I read where you're more detached and logical and I think, "yup....that's about when I made that same realization..." We're getting there, you and me. We cannot ignore our small victories -- our children deserve the efforts we make here.

Some days when I feel highly disgruntled that I should have to shelve my feelings AGAIN, and STfruitU, AGAIN...it helps me to think that I don't have to do this out of love for my spouse every time. Often that is not a sufficient motive. But I can do it out of love for my kids. And love for my Savior. (Edgy, I know, but I read you are religious.) I can treat my H the way GOD thinks he deserves to be treated at times when the way *I* think he deserves to be treated is less than graceful.

After all, forbid that any of us should ever get only what we truly deserve.

K, so, just interjecting that thot while I finish catching up on yer thread.

Hugs!