I created my first post here yesterday (Newbie. First time post. My story & questions) and had a few great responses. I want to start by saying "Thanks"
I read over the "Sandi's 37 rules" that Cadet recommended and there are definitely lots of good tips in there. But, I'm a little confused as to which steps I should follow & which one's I'm ok to avoid, if any?
It's taken me almost a year to realize that I need to start thinking about "me" & taking care of myself first. In reading over the list I've found that I have been doing a ton of things that are recommended I avoid. i.e I've been showering her with gifts, talking about the future, following her around like a puppy, constantly texting with her, keeping conversations going, stressing when I think she's in a negative mood, snooping for clues....the list goes on & on. This is one area I'm going to make a point of checking myself on!
Here's where my confusion lies...I feel my W & I are in a better place than we were 1 year ago or even 3-4 months ago, we are in couples counselling & seem to be making progress. I'm trying to figure out which of the 37 rules I should try & which ones I'm ok to steer clear of!?! Our counsellor has just started giving us "homework" to help reintroduce intimacy into our relationship. My W has been in the ILYBNILWY mode & I still worry that I will get stuck in the "friend zone". It seems like she constantly needs a nudge to move forward with intimacy & will only do so when its recommended by our counsellor or she's scared that I might leave her. Just wondering if anyone who's been in the same situation can offer up any advice as to the steps I should take at this stage? I obviously don't want to jeopardize any of the progress we've made.
