Hi Toots your sounding upbeat and that's nice to hear Out with a new friend , sould we know more ??? The call may be a bit weird but I'm sure you will handle just fine. Good to hear your dad is getting a break
Thanks Gan and RD...no RD, she's female! We've been out once before already. I met her at the ladies social group I joined. She texted and asked if I wanted to go to a psychic evening tomorrow, and in the spirit of accepting invitations I said yes. I'm not really into that kind of thing, but I'll give it a whirl you know....
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Have fun tomorrow night!! A friend of mine hired one of those palm/card reader people for her birthday a couple of years ago. It made for a very laugh filled night. She revealed nothing I didn't already know or was generic & common sense stuff, but we all had a good time listening to her 'read' everyone. I was very disappointed she didn't see large sums of $$ & a Tahiti vacation in my future. Guess I'll have to keep saving for that...lol
M: 43 H: 40 M: 18y S17,D13 D12 IC 11/2014 BD 4/16/15 H home 6/25/15 OW2 EA 6/26/15 MC started 7/22/15 Baby stepping....
Glad you can get yourself moving and doing fun stuff. You have been detaching so well. I understand you still stand for your M, but you are calmer now and the world is getting better for you.
I wonder what your WAH thinks these days. I know we shouldn't wonder about any of their crazy head thinking. But it should drive someone confused if they hear the S wants to work on the M, still have love and yet keep so distant and is having a life.
The only thing that comes to my mind is that he will always see you as a strong woman. And that is actually a very good thing.
I envy you in a good way, I wish I could have the strength to stand firm on my life, but I am still very sensitive and going on cheeseless tunnels sometimes. Not really that H sees it, but I need to be honest with myself and I know I am not detaching much the way I am supposed to.
Keep the good in your life Toots, you are an amazing woman and deserve all the happiness in the world. Cheering for you, like Edz says... Keep on Tootling.
Thanks for stopping by Tweets, Pink and V! Well, H and I spoke today for the first time in a few months as part of getting this phone transferred into my name. We did the transfer, then I decided I would give him a call to say thanks and clarify what will happen next with the account.
We chatted for 15 minutes or so. I had written myself a note with STFU at the top and some conversational Qs to ask. It was a pleasant chat with a couple of laughs...all very upbeat. I tried to STFU and listen. That doesn't come naturally to me though TBH it wasn't hard because he talked about himself quite a bit and hardly asked about me!
He starts his new job on Monday and will be working Mon-Fri with an hours+ commute each day. He's not looking forward to it having just had 4 months off. He says his flatmate (male) is unsympathetic when he complains about this. In recent months he has learned a new skill and also done some volunteering. Sounded like he really enjoyed both, and has made the most of the time off. He didn't sound low or depressed.
We talked a little about my work and working pattern. He told me we had a viewing on the house and he's disappointed we haven't had more. He doesn't plan to go up there much from now on due to the new work regime. SS will travel down to see him now and then (big difference to having SS every weekend...)
We didn't touch on any 'difficult' areas at all, and there was no real 'personal' chat - more like colleagues who get on well & haven't seen each other for a while. He sounded pleased to be having a little chat. I ended the convo, saying I needed to get back to work. I think it all went reasonably well. Weird to talk though. His voice is so intensely familiar, and yet we are so far apart now... It's hard to feel hopeful for our sitch TBH - I look at others sitches and feel more hope for theirs than ours, but maybe many of us feel that way?
Tweets, thanks for your kind comments. It's nice to be thought of as courageous and persevering. I don't always feel that way! And Pink...always lovely to hear from you. Don't be hard on yourself. We are all learning and it isn't easy. I may sound pretty detached, but I don't always feel it. When I go to bed is the time I always think of H. V, the calligraphy was a screen printing workshop. We did big letters and cut them into a stencil, then printed onto fabric. I did Live, laugh, love in three colours on a big cushion which looks lovely on my bed.
Well, I'm off to see Apple shortly....see if the techies can fix my ipad. Catch you all later xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
I quite often feel that way too. But then when I read the ones that actually made it, I also see that the LBS there was feeling the same way.
The truth is that all sitches are like Edz says, it can change very drastically and very fast.
I guess we are doing what we can at the moment, as time goes by we will feel less and less the sharp pain. It will always be there, but will get easier.
Who knows, maybe one day we will all be happy talking about our new adventures.
Keep the good work Toots. It is not easy but you are doing an amazing work to make your life better.
G'day Toots. Glad to hear the phone conversation went well. I know what you mean about the voice being intensely familiar but so very distant. Must have been strange after so long.
In terms of hope, do we hold out hope or do we just be at this stage? I think I've moved into the latter frame of mind. It's not looking at all good in my sitch, but far from negative. And I'm glad that I move into the next phase feeling love and forgiveness for my H. That's better than the alternative I think.
H 37 Me 36 Together 15 years Married 5 years No kids BD Apr 2014 H moved out 2 Jun 2014